Something I Need
by JustJinxed
Summary: When Beth and Daryl escape the prison, they find an abandoned house in the middle of the woods. No matter how safe the house may seem, Beth is never safe from her own thoughts. Rated M for mentions of suicide, language and some smutty situations.


"Hold up, Beth."

His voice was low and gruff. It should sound winded, since they'd been on the move for who know how long, but it wasn't. She guessed he had built up some serious stamina now that the world's ended..then again, maybe he had it before. He was quite the hunter after all. She wished she could say the same about herself, but she did her best to keep up with him. The last thing she wanted to do was slow him down.

After fighting their way out of the prison, they slipped into the woods in search of the rest of their group. Hours passed and the sun started to go down...along with her hopes of ever seeing her sister again. She tried not to think about it. Maggie was alive, she just knew it. Her sister was one of the bravest, toughest people she'd ever met. They would find each other – they _had_ to. They're family.

The only family they had left.

"This way." Daryl gestured towards a narrow clearing of trees.

"What is it?" Beth played with the end of her ponytail nervously as she followed behind him.

"Some kinda trail...might even be a-" His words stopped abruptly as they caught sight of a splash of blue through the trees. As they continued to approach, Beth's eyes widened.

"A house?" Her voice was hushed, but Daryl brought one finger to his lips, signaling for her to stay quiet just in case. Pausing just past the trees, they took in the sight.

The house was beautiful – a soft, powder blue with eggshell white shutters. And it was _big_, too – the occupants must have been pretty well off to be able to build a house (more like a mini mansion) in the middle of the woods like that. Staring up at the second story, Beth's mind drifted back to her home. The old farm house in the middle of nowhere. Her heart squeezed so hard in her chest, she thought for a moment that she might have to bite her tongue to keep from crying out. When she felt a warm hand on her bare shoulder, she nearly jumped out of her skin as her eyes collided with Daryl's.

He didn't speak, but he didn't have to. He knew what she was thinking about, it was written clear across her face. With a small nod, he let his hand slip from her shoulder and started walking towards the back of the house.

The sun was only a dim glow by the time the pair managed to search the entire house. It was completely empty, to their utter shock. There was even a key to the back door under the welcome mat. Daryl was, of course, happy to break the window. The entire house had just seemed so perfect, the little blonde insisted on searching for a key first.

Beth stood in a large walk in closet, admiring the clothes as her fingers brushing the cashmere-like fabric of the dresses. Suddenly her mind drifted and she remembered the small smile Daryl gifted her with at her discovery earlier, she felt her face heat.

"Beth?" His deep voice was quiet and...concerned?

"In here." He stood in the doorway, the brightness of his flashlight making her squint a little. Even though his face was difficult to make out in the new lighting, she knew he wouldn't understand what she was doing.

"..They're beautiful, don't you think?" She knew it was a dumb thing to say as soon as the words left her mouth. Who _cared_ about pretty dresses anymore? Honestly, she was surprised at herself. Had she even realized that she'd been admiring them, or was it just some kind of eighteen year old girl reflex that was still clinging to her old life? The man's eyes lingered on her for a little too long before they shifted to the dresses. He nodded good-naturedly and a comfortable silence fell between them for a moment.

"She got anything more suited for travelin'?" Beth's heart fell into her stomach as the comfort of her daydreams slipped away. Sensing her newly found despair, Daryl quickly changed the subject. "Just grab somethin'. There's plenty of good food in the kitchen...Think they got runnin' water. You can see about gettin' a shower."

"You think it's safe here?" Beth swiped a black tank top and baggy camouflage pants out of a drawer, then walked closer to him. "So close to the prison?" The little bit of amusement she saw in his expression made her feel like her heart had just missed a step and fallen face first onto the staircase.

"You don't realize how far we walked today, do you?" Beth blinked up at him, unable to find words in that particular moment, when all she could focus on was his body heat and those eyes. He breathed out what she assumed was a laugh and stepped back. "Go shower, girl. I'll get some food."

Daryl turned to leave, but before she could stop herself, her hand shot out and caught his arm. Surprised, he looked back at her. When he saw traces of worry and panic in her expression, he frowned and turned back, stepping close to her. He didn't really have any experience in dealing with grief stricken young ladies, so he just remained quiet, hoping that she would give him an idea of what he could do. He wasn't stupid, but this girl definitely puzzled him on more than one occasion. The air around them seemed to grow colder as Beth's brain went into overtime, trying to figure out exactly what it was that she was trying to do.

"..Don't go far." Her voice sounded so small, she could barely believe it was her's. Almost immediately, she cleared her throat and straightened up, hoping that Daryl would just overlook what happened. His eyes were soft on her and she knew that there wasn't a chance of that happening.

"Alright." He nodded, his own voice just as quiet as her's. He moved away, his hand brushing her's in the process. "I'll be out here." He nodded in the direction of the bathroom. "Go on."

Without another word, Beth looked at the floor and wandered into the connecting bathroom. As soon as she closed the door behind her, she caught her own reflection in that bathroom mirror and she stared. Her face was dirtier than usual, platinum hair spilling out of her carefully crafted braids. She remembered fixing her hair just that morning. She had always been an early riser, so she was able to take her time with the braids, making sure her hair would stay out of her face all day, but also look cute. It was the end of the world, but that didn't mean she couldn't have fun or attempt at looking presentable. Beth had just recently started teaching the other little girls more intricate braids than they were used to. Most of the time it just wound up with Beth and her own beauty shop, she wasn't sure how much learning was happening, but as long as they could enjoy themselves and forget what was going on around them for a little while, she didn't mind. Maggie even let her braid her hair every once in a while, when she could get her to slow down for just two seconds. They all had jobs to do. Beth's was taking care of people, mostly the kids, but she made sure to keep an eye on the adults, too. The girl had always been a little too empathetic when it came to other people's emotions, so she was generally the first to notice when someone was having a particularly bad day.

The knobs on the shower squeaked in protest as she turned them, holding her breath in anticipation. Suddenly the faucet came to life as water burst through and she felt a small surge of relief. It was, of course, a very fancy, girly bathroom with expensive looking soaps and shampoos lining the racks built into the shower wall. Slowly she slipped out of her dirty clothes and stepped into the lukewarm water.

_Lukewarm._ A year ago, she never would've thought that lukewarm water would feel like heaven, but the tension in her muscles started to drain. She wasn't sure how it was happening – maybe the owners of the house had been smart enough to hook it up to some kind of generator? Whatever kind of magic was happening, she was definitely not going to question it. The fanciest looking bottle of body wash smelled like vanilla and daisies as she poured it over herself. Part of her still felt strange about walking into someone's house and using their toiletries...but it's not like they needed it anymore, right?

Somehow _that_ was the thought that did it. Her tears were strangely cold in contrast to the water from the shower and she held out a hand to brace herself as sobs began erupting from her throat. She couldn't stop. She didn't think she could cry anymore, but just...just a _flash_ of her father's kind face and she felt her knees buckle.

* * *

Daryl wasn't really sure what to do with himself at this point. Walking over to the window, he decided to keep watch, but the trees were still. Once they made sure the interior of the house was secure, he and Beth had locked all the doors and windows, going so far as to push heavy pieces of furniture in front of the main exits. They've had enough surprises for one day. As he walked back to the bed, he realized that he felt several rocks in both of his shoes and removed them, shaking them out with his socks on the carpet. Suppressing a sigh, he allowed himself to enjoy the feeling. When was the last time he'd felt carpet on his bare feet? He waited for the shower to turn on, nodding a little to himself when he heard the water start to spray. Good. He imagined that scrubbing off the dirt and grime might help the girl get her mind right...but he wasn't really sure where her mind was in the first place. He knew Beth had lost people before...Her mom, her boyfriend. Others that they had known along the way. He just wasn't really sure how she would handle this, though. Hershel was a good man, probably one of the best men he'd ever met. Daryl himself held plenty of sadness in his heart for such a great man to have died in such an awful way...but Hershel was Beth's father. To see your father _beheaded_ by a madman...even now, what would that do to a person?

It wasn't like worrying about Beth's mental state was a strange thing, regardless of the situation. Only in the more recent months had they grown close, but he remembered what happened back at the farmhouse, when Beth went into shock and tried to end it all. He guessed that wasn't fair. It was a long time ago, she was so strong now, she –

Suddenly Daryl heard a loud thud from the bathroom, and he was almost immediately at the door.

"Beth?" He called to her from outside. Maybe she had just dropped a bottle or something in there? Everything could be fine. After a silence that lasted far too long, Daryl decided to open the door. He called her name again, keeping his eyes low to the ground just in case this was all a misunderstanding. It wasn't until he heard the choking sob coming from the shower that he let himself look at her.

The bathroom was filled with steam at this point, the mirrors and tiny windows clouded over. And there, huddled in the corner of the shower, was Beth. The sight made Daryl feel like someone was stabbing him in the chest as he grabbed the nearest towel and rushed towards her.

"C'mon girl." He reached into the shower and started turning the knob, the water growing weaker as he did so. Just then, Beth swiftly stood, eyes focused on Daryl. He would be a liar if he tried to say that he was surprised...actually, he wished he knew of a more extreme word than that. In his mind, he rolled through his entire vocabulary while he made sure his eyes stayed on her face and didn't wander anywhere else. Her eyes were slightly puffy and red while her cheeks were stained pink by the warmth of the shower. They remained that way for what felt like a lifetime before the man finally realized that he should probably say something, otherwise his body might just take over for him.

"...Sorry. Thought you needed help. I'll let you get back to it."

"Don't leave." Her wet hand grasped his wrist and it took every ounce of willpower for him to still keep his eyes on her's.

"I'm right out there." He nodded at the wall, but her expression didn't change. Again, they stared at each other. Daryl's confused expression would have made her laugh under any other circumstance, but her mind was focused elsewhere.

Stepping closer to the edge of the shower, her small hands pulled at Daryl's angel winged vest until it was resting on the floor not far from her own clothes. If she thought he looked confused before, she wasn't sure how she would accurately describe this new one. It looked like it had been magnified about ten times.

"Beth?"

"You should shower, too."

"I was gonna..when you got through." Her fingers made quick work of his undershirt, so that it joined the vest on the ground. Confused as he was, he made no attempt to stop her. Her slippery hands trailed down the length of his torso, leaving wet streaks as they went. She shook her head.

"There won't be any warm water left." Her hands hesitated when she felt the fabric of his pants and his breathed hitched. What in the hell was _happening_ right now?

"...M'used to that." Beth just shook her head and tugged him into the shower by his belt loops. Reaching behind him, she turned the knob up so that the shower was on full blast again. The water rushed down his back and he closed his eyes, enjoying the moment, no matter how strange it was. Who knows when he'll feel warm water like this again? It wasn't until he felt Beth's soft hands rubbing soap over him that he opened his eyes again. Still, he kept his gaze focused above Beth's head. "What's gotten into you, girl?" The silence was so thick, he felt like he might suffocate before she spoke.

"You need to get clean."

"Not much of an answer."

"You can't even look at me." She sounded crushed. Like a kicked puppy. It made him feel worse, but there wasn't really a guide to this kind of situation, was there?

"Tryin' to do the decent thing here." Try being the key word. Her hands moved to his hair, rubbing shampoo into his scalp while he closed his eyes again, wondering just _exactly_ how he got into this. It wasn't until he was _sure_ that he felt her naked breasts against his ribcage that he placed his hands on her shoulders and guided her away from him. "I don't think you realize what you're doin' here." He looked her square in the eye and just when he thought there could be no more surprises, a stubborn glint appeared in her gaze.

"I do." Suddenly emboldened, she reached for his belt buckle so quickly, it was off before he realized what the clanging on the tile floor was.

"_Beth_." His hands shot out and wrapped around her tiny wrists as she reached for the zipper of his pants. He pinned her wrists gently against the ceramic wall behind her. "You tell me what's goin' on in that head of your's right now. I ain't got the patience for all this." Immediately he regretted his words as her face fell and she looked as though she may start crying again.

"Sorry." She looked down, crushed and more than a little embarrassed.

"For _what_?" The hint of desperation in his voice made her look up at him again. "You're all I got right now, Beth. Don't start playin' some kinda fucked up mind games, you gotta keep it together." Without another word, Beth leaned forward just a little and crushed her lips against Daryl's. She could feel his initial resistance. He didn't move, still keeping her hands pinned to either side of her. Just as she felt another wave of embarrassment wash over her, she felt him start to relax against her lips. Slowly his mouth started moving with her's and he leaned closer almost as if he didn't notice he was doing it. Before he could stop himself, his hands moved to cup her face, leaving Beth's hands free to roam his muscular arms, tight chest and finally pull his hips against her's. When she felt him harden beneath his soaked pants at the contact, he broke the kiss, but didn't pull back far. "_Fuck, woman."_

His dark eyes were clouded with all kinds of emotions she couldn't name, but they still sent a warm feeling all through her body, the target area definitely being between her thighs. She wanted him then. She knew she had wanted him before, but always tried to push the thoughts from her head. What would everyone else think? There was the obvious age difference, and she supposed that would be enough for most people, but could they really be held to society's standards in this day and age? Then there was his friendship with Carol that initially made her wonder if he was already spoken for, but as the months passed, she found that it was only a close friendship. She understood that they trusted each other deeply, but it was no more than that. Daryl had never really seemed like the relationship type...and until a few months ago, she didn't think that he saw her as anything more than...maybe the equivalent of a third cousin. But they understood each other a little better now. Maybe he didn't see her as some quiet little girl anymore.

Though, after this encounter, she really doubted that he would _ever_ think of her that way again.

"I don't want to feel alone anymore, Daryl." His expression cleared for the most part, only a glint of that darkness that she had been so fascinated with seconds ago.

"You ain't." He said simply. Like he wasn't sure what the problem was.

"I know." As she spoke, she pulled one of her hands free and tangled it in the hair at the nape of his neck. "I just wanna _feel_ that." With that, she pulled his head down so that their lips touched, more gentle this time. The kiss started slow and sweet, like they were both taking the time to memorize each and every touch, every taste of the others lips. Beth's confidence grew and she decided to take a chance, flicking her tongue out timidly. Daryl leaned into her more, the kiss instantly intensifying and before Beth knew it, she found herself pressed against the shower wall again. One of her bare legs hooked around Daryl's thigh and she heard him try and hold back a grunt in return. Really finding her courage, Beth slowly guided the calloused hand that was pressed so tenderly against her neck down to her breast. With a more animalistic growl than she was expecting, she felt his large hand squeeze her in a much more pleasing fashion than she could have ever anticipated. It wasn't until his thumb and index finger pinched her nipple lightly that a moan escaped her and she thought that she really might lose her mind. Reluctantly, Daryl dropped his hand and pulled away once again.

"I can't do this, Beth." Her heart sank.

"Why not?" She felt small again. Her voice, her body...her entire _being _felt small and insignificant. She hadn't realized that a girl could still feel rejection, even at the end of days. When Daryl just continued staring a hole into the wall, she tentatively touched his cheek, her voice even quiet this time. "Look at me." Her face flushed as Daryl started his perusal. His eyes dropped down to her feet, up her shapely legs, remarkably long looking for such a short girl. Then there was the area that he just wanted to drop down to his knees and lavish with attention, her belly that he imagined he could enjoy kissing all the way up to those perfect, perky breasts, the flawless collarbone and slender neck that he wanted to lick and bury his face in as he – he was going to get himself in trouble with this line of thinking. Finally, he reached her face and those clear blue eyes that just help so much inside. He saw embarrassment and nerves, but also worry and just the _slightest_ bit of hope.

"...I gotta make sure your head's on straight." She raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

"Beth." He sighed. "You been through a lot. Just...wanna make sure you know what you're doin'. Can't take somethin' like that back."

"I wouldn't want to." He gave her a patient look, which only added fuel to her fire. "I've thought about this for a long time, Daryl. It's not some kinda post-traumatic stress or something! I _want_ this."

"Still." He paused, reaching behind himself to shut the water off. "It wouldn't hurt to think on it a little longer."

"Daryl-"

"For my sake, Beth." He stepped out of the shower, grabbing two towels.

"Don't you want me?" There was so much uncertainty in her voice, Daryl had to turn and look at her. He watched her for a while, his expression blank. Just when she was starting to think she couldn't feel anymore uncomfortable, Daryl stepped forward and wrapped the big, fluffy white towel around her.

"You bet your ass." It was so blunt and crude, Beth could help but cover her mouth to hide her laugh. He grinned in return. "But it's gonna be your decision." He started to towel himself off. "Now put some clothes on. I'm starved."


End file.
